“Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another: ‘What! You too? I thought I was the only one.” - C.S. Lewis

“Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.” — 1 Thessalonians 5:11

We cannot enter the month of February without seeing all the hearts, flowers, and pink fluffy things covering all the stores. It’s like a pink storm that overtakes every business and store. These colors, decorations, yummy treats, and precious gifts are all a reflection of the love that abounds around us. Within our families, friendships, and lives, we can find love (and hopefully find it in abundance!). Which is why Valentine’s Day, and all that comes with it, is so popular. We love LOVE! We want to feel love in our life, not even just romantic love. But also friendship, loyalty, generosity, community, affection, adoration, and all the various aspects of love. So, for this month, I wanted to ponder, dwell and share about love!

In the first week’s blog, I chatted about God’s love, because that is where love originates and flows into our lives. Then we chatted about families and ways to celebrate and encourage and support each other. 

We love because he first loved us. - 1 John 4:19

For this blog, we are going to explore ways to grow and build a community! This is something that is difficult for me. As someone who is extremely introverted, it can be hard to find ways to build a community or to invest in friendships, especially during seasons of stress or busyness. Yet, I also recognize how important community is in our lives. There has been so much research about the power of community, and friendships in aiding against loneliness, as well as increasing our sense of purpose. Making it something that is incredibly worth our time and energy!

BUILDING COMMUNITY 

“Friendship consists in forgetting what one gives and remembering what one receives.” - Alexander Dumas

When we are kids, making friends and building communities is second nature. You could walk up to someone and ask them to play. Voila! A friendship has begun. Why is that as we get older it just gets harder? There are more differences of opinion, more busyness in our schedules, and more difficulty in finding the energy for more people or more events. All of this means that we have to be intentional. Choosing who we want to invest in, and what kind of things will work best for us. So, before we even start looking at ideas for creating and building community, I want you to pause and think about the community you already have. Do you have plenty of surface level friendships, but missing deep connections? Are you aching for big gatherings full of people who want to spend time together? Are you in a phase of life where you wish there were more people around you who would understand it? Looking at the community you already have, and the community you are missing will help you understand what will help you most and where you should put your focus! Are you ready? 

Here are a few ideas for building and growing your community:

• Find a group to join! Whether that’s a small group at your church, or a class at your local library, there are often groups already created within our community. You can find one that matches your season of life, or something you want to learn. 

• Invite some people over. Don’t make it a big deal, don’t feel like it has to be perfect. Just invite some people over! It could be for a meal, or to hang out, or to play games. See where it could lead! Maybe it won’t turn into anything, or maybe you will start lasting friendships. 

• Set up a get together with friends you haven’t seen in a while! You could even just meet up at a coffee shop, or a park. Ask questions, chat, laugh, have fun. 

• Start your own group! It could be a book club, parent’s group, Bible study, or even a dinner club. Invite people that you want to get to know better. Have fun and be creative with it! 

• Look for leadership opportunities at your church, or community center, or library. As a leader of a group or activity, you can get to know more people and build more connections! 

• Pray about it! When in doubt, spend some time chatting with God about what community might already be around you and that would be worthy of your time! 

“A friend is one that knows you as you are, understands where you have been, accepts what you have become, and still, gently allows you to grow.” - Shakespeare

QUESTIONS AND REFLECTIONS 

One of my favorite things to do is to ponder, reflect and journal, it gives me time to think through all the various aspects of life. May you find time in your day or your week, to sit and reflect. You can use these questions as a starting place for your reflection, or just an addition to your normal journal rhythm.

1. What does your community look like right now?  

2. What are some ways you want to grow your community?

3. How can you focus on your community over the next couple of months? 

4. Journal about any goals or ideas you have for building and growing your community.

5. What’s one thing from this blog that you want to use or put into action? 

“Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins. Offer hospitality to one another without grumbling. Each of you should use whatever gift you have received to serve others, as faithful stewards of God’s grace in its various forms.” - 1 Peter 4:8-10

“Wishing to be friends is quick work, but friendship is a slow ripening fruit.” - Aristotle